


where babies come from

by dutiesofcare



Category: The Haunting of Bly Manor (TV)
Genre: Canon Compliant, Canon Lesbian Relationship, Domestic, Domestic Fluff, F/F, Family, Fluff, Humor, Romance, Sharing a Bed, Sleep talking, Useless Lesbians
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-17
Updated: 2020-10-17
Packaged: 2021-03-09 01:48:40
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,946
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27066658
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dutiesofcare/pseuds/dutiesofcare
Summary: Jamie has had a secret that she's been keeping for a long time and she finally tells Dani: Dani talks in her sleep.
Relationships: Dani Clayton/Jamie
Comments: 20
Kudos: 430





	where babies come from

**Author's Note:**

> for all the useless fellow lesbians out there

Dani woke up with the sensation of someone poking her upper arm.

She frowned, trying to ignore the annoying touch, unsuccessfully. The panting came again, leaving her no alternative than to turn towards the opposite side of the bed and come across a very crossed human being with the traits of an even more crossed British woman.

She tried to suppress a yawn, before realizing there was no point. Her whole body was now facing Jamie’s side of the bed and she was more than ready to succumb herself to unconsciousness again, potentially landing in a dream where there were no demons and no British grumpy women creeping her while she slept. 

“Hmm? What is it?” Dani managed to blurt quietly, her voice still hoarse from the sleep running in her veins.

Jamie left her stare on Dani, barely blinking, their bodies buried underneath a mountain of blankets that Dani insisted on pulling over them because _she had been cold_ . She sighed, _noticeably_ , to make sure she had heard her sign of protest despite her closed eyes.

“I can’t do this anymore, Dani,” she grunted, sounding too much like a spoiled child. 

Dani’s groan of annoyance was almost completely muffled by her face buried against the pillow underneath her head. Almost. “Can’t do what, sleep?”

She wrinkled her nose, absurdly. “ _Yes_.”

“Just lay down and close your eyes. Trust me, sleep will come to you,” she argued, pulling the velvet over her head only to have them completely yanked by Jamie.

Dani would kill her when she was up. Jamie _knew_ that.

Jamie watched as Dani automatically pulled her legs up to her chest, in vain attempts of escaping the chilly air they had just encountered. Jamie moved to a sitting position. “You’re not asleep anymore, so, Dani, I’m begging you to listen to me,” he paused briefly, “I can’t do this anymore. I really can’t.”

Dani’s forehead turned into curves of pouting when she realized the tone of the brunette’s voice. Struggling, she forced her torso up until their eyes almost conquered the same height. Her lips remained half-open for a brief moment. “What is it, Jamie? You’re scaring me.”

Tenderly, Jamie pulled her hands to her own lap. Playing with them, studying the path of each bone underneath her skin. “What I’m about to tell you… I need you to promise me you won’t be mad at me.”

She tilted her head, fighting the urge to lift her eyebrows as high as the Arc de Triomphe. “I can’t do such a thing,” she contested, “You’re easy to become mad at.”

Jamie twirled with her lips before reluctantly agreeing. “Fair enough. But still, I don’t want to have to sleep on the couch for the next month.”

Dani made a face, “What have you _done,_ Jamie?”

Jamie let out the longest of breaths, taking Dani’s hands to her mouth so they would muff the sound of her vocals. “Alright. Dani… You talk in your sleep.”

“ _What?_ ” she almost shouted, leaving Jamie unsure whether she hadn’t heard her or was simply shocked.

Jamie tried to hide her face away from her. “You do. Quite a lot, actually.”

Dani jerked herself free from her touch and Jamie immediately raised a pillow in the air between the two of them. Protecting herself from her attacks, she _knew_ . Her lips were turned into a curve of jolt, “I do _not_!”

“You do,” she repeated. “It’s creepy.”

She strongly pulled the pillow away from her, leaving her with no means of defense. “Even if I do – which I don’t – how is that creepy, Jamie?”

“It’s dead silent in the middle of the night and suddenly you raise your head and say something _completely_ out of context! Soon enough I’m going to scare myself to death!”

Dani rolled her eyes until they reached the back of her head. “You’re being _dramatic_.”

Jamie scoffed, “I’m being _realistic_.”

She crossed her arms against her chest. “Why didn’t you ever say anything to me before?! If it bothers you so much.”

“Because!” she gesticulated with her hands in the air. “Look how mad you are! I didn’t want to upset you!”

“Then why are you telling me now?!” her eyes were as wide as ever. “And FYI, I’m not mad at the fact that I _presumably_ talk in my sleep. I’m just mad at you.”

“How I’m going to miss this bed,” she muffed underneath her breath, getting hit with a pillow on her arm in response. “I’m telling you because I can’t do it alone anymore, Dani. I need the world to know how embarrassing you are when you’re asleep.”

Her jaw fell and formed an _o_ with her mouth. “That’s not fair. I’m not conscious, I can’t control what I’m doing. You can’t hold it against me, Jamie.”

“ _Pretty embarrassing_ ,” she emphasized, grabbing the pillow away from her when she was midway to hit her again.

Dani blew a lock of her hair away from her face. “Define _embarrassing_.”

She shook her head vigorously. “I don’t want to. I’ll get embarrassed. You’ll get mad.”

“ _Madder_ ,” Dani corrected her, raising her index finger in the air. “Why did you tell me I talk in my sleep if you refuse to tell me anything further?”

“Because we need to do something about it, Dani,” Jamie said, “If any ghosts are lurking by, they’ll think you’re inviting them in when you scream to the dead of the night that _the fish will drown if we leave it in the tank_.”

“You can’t just _fix_ it, Jamie,” her lips were ironically flat, ignoring her remark of the ghosts of their lives. “It’s something I’ve done ever since a child—”

Jamie’s pupils dilated and she gasped, “ _You knew…_!”

“ _No_!” she was quick to reaffirm, “Well, my mum said I did it in my childhood, but I thought I had outgrown that condition.”

“You filthy liar…!” she accused her.

This time, she used her own fist to give her a gentle punch in the shoulder, way slighter than Jamie made it to be. “Shut up.”

Jamie rubbed her hand over the impact area, offering the most dramatic face she had. “Fine. You want me to tell you all the lack of sense you make while you’re asleep? I’ll tell you.”

Dani mouthed her a silenced _thank you_ , trying to contain her grin as she settled in a better position to listen to her – feet messily thrown into her lover’s lap, legs forming a forty-five angle with her own tights, head resting in the gap between her knees. She waited.

“Now, I would just like to remind you that this all just happened to occur under my watch, I am not responsible for anything that you might have said and done during those… _times_ ,” she cleared her throat until it was rid of the lump formed there.

“ _Shut up_ and _tell me_ ,” she demanded, her American accent more accentuated than usual.

“Alright,” Jamie breathed out, looking directly into her reflection in Dani’s eyes as she began, “There was this time, you had been asleep for a while then, so when you tugged deeper into me, I only thought you were looking for some body heat. Imagine my confusion when you leaned into my ear and whispered, _I love cupcake_.”

Dani started giggling, her chest shaking as she did so. “I _do_ love cupcakes.”

“Yes, and for whatever reason you felt obliged to tell me that in the middle of the night. I thought you were giving me hints of what to get you or something.”

She tossed her brows together, “Is that why you made me cupcakes that one time for breakfast?”

She nodded. “Yup, but when you didn’t acknowledge my effort to satisfy your love for cupcakes, I started to sense that something was… off.”

Dani scoffed, “And when did your sensation turn into certainty?”

“A few nights later,” she explained. “You had dozed off next to me, so I was just busying myself with some book. Next thing I know, you suddenly sat up and asked me, _three times four equals twelve?_ I barely nodded and you fell down the mattress again and didn’t move until the morning.”

She held her palm against her lips, “At least my math expertise is still quite good.”

“Sure it is,” she assented, giving slow massages to her feet, one at a time. “Once, when I was sure you were already dropped dead after some tiring day, I brought you closer to me and confessed, _I love you_ . And of course my speculation was confirmed when you replied, simply, _yes, dear, I’ll deal with the monkeys tomorrow_.”

She allowed her tongue to travel the borders of her lips, “It’s not easy dealing with the monkeys, dear, you should know that already.”

Her left eye was slightly higher than her right one. “I hope you realize you’re making fun of yourself, Dani.”

She consented with a smirk. “I just didn’t know I was _that_ funny.”

“Yes, indeed,” she scolded with her voice tone, but Dani just didn’t care. “In fact, you’re so funny one night you startled me off by _frantically_ laughing, unable to stop. It was a whole two minutes of laughter before you looked at me and said, _sausage_. Your laugh only increased by the hearing of the word previously in your mind – I suppose – and I swear it was about ten minutes until you finally calmed down.”

“And you just put up with giggling me for that long?” she pondered, smiling.

“Your laugh is adorably annoying, Dani, I couldn’t just nudge you back to unconsciousness,” she clarified. “It sounded something like this…”

Taking her by complete surprise, Jamie leaned closer to Dani and started tickling her body. As expected, Dani began to laugh uncontrollably, feeling herself weak to her bones and she fell on her back against the bed, Jamie right on top of her, still working her fingers up and down the skin of her belly underneath her blouse. She twisted and jerked, desperately trying to free herself from Jamie’s hold, but failing miserably.

“Stop…!” she begged between gasps, between laughs, “Please stop…!”

Eventually, Jamie obeyed her commands. Their legs casually intertwined themselves as Jamie pushed the hair away from Dani’s face, brushing her temples as gently as she knew how to be. Placing a peck of a kiss right in the path of the just departed thumbs. Leaving her wet lips in contact with her smooth skin for several moments.

“Jamie,” she called her quietly, neither willing to change their position. “You woke me up and said _you couldn’t do it anymore_. Had I just said something weird?”

Jamie chuckled. “As a matter of fact, you had, Dani. You were just asking me, _Jamie, have you gotten any mail of mine? I ordered a baby but it still hasn’t arrived_ . To which I innocently reply, _you ordered a baby? What kind of baby did you order?_ Silly me, of course, as you snapped, _don’t be ridiculous, that’s not how it works._ ”

Dani buried her face in the crook of her neck as Jamie fell back to her side of the bed, taking her along. Her lips were stuck at the beginning of a smile – Jamie’s, at the ending of one. She uttered softly, “Jamie? Since we’re being so honest tonight, I need to tell you a thing.”

She rested her jawline against the blonde’s scalp, allowing the scent of her hair to invade her nose. “Hm? What is it?”

Dani wrapped her arms around Jamie’s waistband, nesting perfectly by her side. “You snore.”

Jamie let out a sad excuse of a laugh, pulling her closer. “Shut up.”

**Author's Note:**

> leave me a comment uwu


End file.
